Why you shouldn’t become a wedding coordinator

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This might seem an odd topic to cover when we sell courses that help you become a wedding coordinator. But hear us out.

Wedding coordination is hard work. It’s not all roses, gowns and confetti!

Long unsociable hours, tricky clients, and bringing someone else’s vision to life are some drawbacks to this role.

So before you race into it, you need to stop and pause for a moment to check if this is the right path for you.

Yes, we could just lie and say, ‘oh, being a wedding coordinator is amazing 100% of the time, and you’ll love every second!’ But, we’d rather be honest with you now than you find out later that your dream job wasn’t quite what you thought it would be.

Firstly, what is a wedding coordinator? Yes, people get this a bit confused!

Wedding planner desk with computer and chair

This might seem obvious, but you wouldn’t believe the number of people we’ve spoken to who don’t have a tight grasp on the facts; instead, it’s the fantasy about what a wedding coordinator does that fills their minds.

The main chunk of a wedding coordinator’s role is managing people. Whether that’s contacts from their little black book, suppliers, venue staff or the wedding party. Maybe it’s fair to say that a large part of the role is managing other people’s emotions – their stress, worry and anticipation.

On top of that, you might offer creative assistance, suggesting colour schemes, themes, decorations or setting up the venue on the day.

Your role is to be one step ahead of the bride and groom. Taking the stress away from them and making their entire wedding experience magical. You’ll be dealing with the logistics, the nitty gritty and the schedule. It’s not an easy job, but it is one that can be endlessly rewarding…..for the right person.

Ultimately, it’s less to do with ideas or aesthetics than you think. Although this certainly plays a role, you’ll be more focused on managing an event than how it all looks.

Why might you like to be a wedding coordinator?

Wedding cake and flowers

Wedding coordination has a romance around it – you’re helping two people come together and celebrate their love. Who wouldn’t want to be involved in that?

Maybe, like so many of us, you played weddings as a child – spending hours dreaming up different weddings and obsessing over the details, putting a pillowcase on your head as a veil (sidenote: tell us it’s not just us, right?) Maybe you fell in love with the planning of your own wedding and were bursting with ideas. Maybe you’re already in planning or events and want to move into a more personal affair?

They’re all valid reasons. And with the right training, nothing is stopping you from becoming a wedding coordinator, in theory at least.

You see, good wedding coordinators are organised, experienced and knowledgeable about their industry.

Great wedding coordinators have that, but they’re also solution-focused, have an established network, are skilled negotiators and are meticulous in their work.

What are the realities of being a wedding coordinator?

Woman at desk working, showing reality of becoming a wedding planner

So there’s the side filled with happiness and love and rainbows. But we want to make sure anyone who’s changing careers to become a wedding coordinator goes into it with their eyes fully open.

The reality is that being a wedding coordinator can be hard, and you need to weigh up everything before making a decision.

Here are the biggest surprises to new wedding coordinators:

  1. 1. It’s physically and mentally draining

Spending 10-15 hours on your feet on a wedding day, often eating and drinking sporadically, takes its toll on you. Chances are that you’ll end up moving things around, lifting and carrying. It’s not all clipboards and fancy headsets (we blame JLo in the movie Wedding Planner for this stereotype!) So be prepared for the next day’s wedding hangover where your body aches, your head feels muzzy, and you’re exhausted! And you haven’t even had a drop of wine!

2. It’s anti-social hours

The nature of this work is that you need to be available when your clients are. This usually means evenings and weekends. If you have other commitments or dependents, then think about how you’ll balance that with the job. This is NOT a work-from-home kinda deal.

3. It’s high stress

Ok, so this one might not be a surprise. But you need to think about how you handle stress and, more importantly, how you handle other people’s stress. Stress is guaranteed with this job, and managing your own effectively is key to your success and long-term happiness.

Remember you are organising and managing one of the most important days of someone’s life. Stress comes with the territory.

4. It requires patience and understanding 

Weddings may seem magical for you right now, but by the time you’ve organised five, ten or one-hundred, you will see them differently. They’re a process that you continuously fine-tune and manage, And even though that doesn’t mean you’re not passionate about them, they don’t typically have that same ‘magic’.

But for your couple, this will be their only wedding (well, we hope!)

So while things may feel like small decisions to you, you need to have patience and understanding that this is a big deal to your clients. Interpersonal skills to coach them through these decisions are key.

5. It’s a lot of responsibility

Couples place their wedding day in your care, for you to look after and create the day they’ve been dreaming of. The stakes are high. Everyone is looking to you to deliver. It can feel like a lot. You need to be able to take a deep breath, take control and get the job done.

This pressure should fuel and excite you. It should light a fire in you. Because when things go wrong (and trust us, they will), you should think, ‘okay, I’m going to enjoy solving this problem!’ If you’re the type of person to react badly in these situations, becoming a wedding coordinator might not be right for you.

We usually say the same thing: if you’re a Monica kind of person, then wedding coordination, and all that comes with it, should excite you. Phoebe or Rachel kind of person, maybe not!

6. It’s highly emotional

Whether that’s anxiety and nerves beforehand, joy on the day and everything in between. Every stage comes with its own emotions, and you need to help navigate your couple through them while keeping your emotions under control.

Chances are you’ll have grown close to your couple during the planning process, but you can’t spend the ceremony sobbing with happiness. You need to keep your emotions in check and professional, no matter what’s going on in front of you.

7. It’s all on you

When you become a wedding coordinator, often you’re running your own business. That means that everything comes down to you. Finding work, admin, bookkeeping. It’s all on you. It requires confidence in yourself, drive, and most of all, passion for what you’re doing.

A lot of your time will be spent NOT coordinating weddings. You’ve got to see yourself as a business owner, not a wedding coordinator. So even if you’re organising events right now, running a successful business is still a huge learning curve.

Why might you have to think about the decision before you choose a career as a wedding coordinator?

With any job, there are things that you need to think about before you get started. That’s definitely the case with becoming a wedding coordinator.

So before you jump in, here are some questions to honestly ask yourself:

  • Do you have the stamina to deliver the job?
  • How good are you in social situations?
  • Do you believe in yourself?
  • Can you negotiate?
  • How organised are you?
  • Are you always on time (or early)?
    How do you cope with other people’s stress and emotions?
  • Are you happy to frequently work evenings and weekends?
  • Do you have dependents or other commitments that rely on you?
  • Are you passionate about doing this?

These are questions you need to think about and answer with brutal honesty. You don’t want to throw yourself into this new career only to find that it wasn’t what you expected.

Why are we writing this article when we sell wedding planning courses?

We love weddings. We love everything about them. But we also know that they’re hard work. The point of this article isn’t to scare you away – we’d be out of business pretty quickly if it was!

It’s easy to get swept up in the romance of what you think wedding planning will be like. The gorgeous gowns, dreamy flowers and celebration of love. That’s why we feel it’s our job to ensure everyone taking one of our courses or considering going into wedding planning is aware of the difficulties, struggles and downsides.

That way, we know that the people who sign up for our courses are truly committed, passionate and excited to get stuck in. If they’re excited now, that will only grow as they progress through their course – creating knowledgeable and passionate wedding coordinators. And we think they’re the best kind.

If you’ve made it this far without running away and hiding, then it’s only fair that we should let you know about our courses. 

Our courses are designed to open doors to a new job or your own business in the wedding industry. They’re comprehensive and easy to digest, imparting all of our knowledge and experience so you can take the next step towards your dream career.

Find out more about our wedding planning courses.


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David Tutera

Leading Wedding & Entertaining Expert, David Tutera is hailed as an artistic visionary whose ability, uniquely creative talents and outstanding reputation have made him a tremendous success in the lifestyle arena. Tutera has created a name for himself by taking his passion for designing spectacular events and transforming it into a lifestyle.

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